Blue── Er, well, Pixel, turns around to the source of the voice. He seemed hesitant at first, shoulders rising up to his ears. He never expected another version of himself to visit him, let alone an adult one. He looked so… Odd. Pixel couldn’t put his finger on it.

As soon as the other greeted Justine though, Pixel felt himself relax more. It seems like this was safe, seeing that the player gave a thumbs up back to Blue.

Pixel listens, thoughts running around, especially when Revvy was mentioned. It’s painful to hear his name uttered from someone else, but he can manage it. It’s rude to make faces at a guest, so Pixel bites his bottom lip to keep his expression neutral.

“So it's… it’s you, right? The um,”

Pixel gestures over to Blue,

“It feels nice that I’m not the only one── I mean! Obviously it’s, it’s not great but, it’s just nice that there’s other people like me, I guess? Or are me? This is weird──Not that you’re weird!”

He nervously chuckles, he can’t help but smile. Taking a step or two closer, the child leans side to side, studying Blue. Super tall, lanky. Pixel wondered if this is what he could have looked like if he were to have grown up someday. Would he have hair like this? Clothes like that?

Would he still have his eye if he didn't…

Ah! A question was directed to him, and he was staring!

“Sorry!”

C'mon, Pix! Be polite! He mumbles, giving out some “um” and “uh” noises as he wiggles his hands,

“It’s um, it’s nice to see you, first of all sir── sir? I um, I dunno what you call you, sorry── but to answer your question,”

He glanced back at the player, who holds the 3DS patiently. Justine blinks and directs her attention to the bottom screen. Oh whoa, Pixel projected a little drawing down there!

“I wanted to delete my game, and Gramps wanted to also. We talked about it before I talked to Justine about it, but… she really didn’t like that idea.

She convinced me that the game doesn’t have to be played normally to… function? I think that’s the word. But um, yeah. We pretty much talked for a while and it turned into a habit where she’d visit me everyday before she went to school.

She showed me some cool stuff from her world, like other games, some TV shows, and movies. I really um, I really like hanging out with her! She helps me sort out my thoughts about… about the stuff that happened in my game.”

Pixel smiles warmly as he explains. While talking, he lightly rocks on his heels,

“I really am lucky to have someone like her. It makes me sad that some other beings like me and you don’t have that kind of a player out there.”

Pixel’s smile alters once he glanced back up to his older self. He gulps, a finger pointing up── no wait, that’s rude too. He pulls it back,

“Please let me know if this is rude to ask but um…

Why are your hands … Blue?”

creatively-cosmic:

we figured out a better way to do sprites (instead of freeballing it i edit and frankenstein other sprites together and THEN draw over and recolor it. its proven effective thus far) so heres some kantonians!!

HOW IT FEELS TO DISAPPEAR: DESCENT

WARNINGS: Disturbing Imagery.

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[Try to comfort him.]
[DO THE RIGHT THING. AND GET RID OF THE EEVEE.]

You can feel such an awful lump in your throat, seeing how hurt he is. You breathe in deeply and calm yourself. Your shaking voice sweetens into something soft and comforting.

“Blue…” you call to him, “Hey, look…! I’m here- I’m here for you, bud, you’re not alone…”

He curls in on himself even tighter. You hear him mutter something, but it’s so soft, so muffled, you can’t quite understand.

“I- I’m sorry about earlier,” you continue, willing yourself to keep your composure. “I’m sorry I left you alone for so long… but I’m here now! Whatever you’re thinking and whatever’s going on, you don’t have to deal with it alone anymore. I promise. I may not know what’s going on, but…”

You watch him perk up a bit. You feel a twinge of hope. That your words mean something. That you’re getting through to him. That things will be okay.

“I want to help you,” you finish, holding a hand out to him.

Blue turns, slowly. He meets your eyes from where he cowers below you, allowing you to finally see the poor boy’s face.

His eyes and cheeks glisten with tears, and with how red and puffy they are, you wonder how long he’s been here, crying like this. His dusty-brown irises almost seem to reflect as an ocean blue, despite the dim lighting…

“Leaf…” he whispers, turning and shakily rising to his feet. Your full attention lands on him- anything he has to say. You’ll do anything.

“Please… Please…”

You watch your friend wince. You swear- you can hear some kind of second voice- a voice that seems to illicit that reaction from him. But you can’t strain to listen, can’t even react. Blue lurches forward, barely catching himself on your shoulders.

“Don’t listen to him- to THEM- it’s all LIES, Leaf, they just want-”

He gasps, head snapping up to look at something to the side. He seems so scared. Dread bubbling in your chest, you follow his eyes.

The countless Ghosts of unfamiliar Channelers turn to look right at you.

“… Run,” he breathes, and then he starts to yell, “JUST GO, LEAF! GET OUT!!”

You try to protest, “but you-”

“NOW! JUST RUN!”

The way the boy screams, the way he shoves you away, the way Eevee cries in your arms… and the way you can feel every last ghost lurch towards you-

Pure instinct and adrenaline overwhelms you.

Half-stumbling from Blue’s push, every fearful word and question dying in your throat, you turn heel and run.

Somehow, you don’t have to turn to know that the spirits all rush right past Blue, leaving him untouched, unharmed-

It’s the only thing that you can understand in this frantic moment: You’re the one they want.

Thank the Gods, the exit to this floor has reappeared.

As fast as you feet could possibly carry you, you practically fly down the Pokemon Tower, the chill of bloody hands and screams of souls in rapid pursuit driving you forward in blind terror. The floors on floors of the graveyard are nothing but a blur of tiles and tombs and stairs and candlelight. You give nothing even a chance to slow you down.

As you focus your hands on clinging tight to Eevee, you feel your hat fly off your head- a consequence of your frantic speed and lack of care.

Stopping to save it isn’t even a thought in your mind at this point.

Suddenly, you burst out of the front doors of the tower, and you finally lose your footing and fall face-first, skidding gracelessly into the dew-soaked grass of Lavender Town. Eevee is flung out of your arms on the way down, and you feel your one slipper fly off your foot, leaving you both empty handed and barefoot.

It hurts. Your face, elbows, knees all sting like hell with how hard you went down. You know you can’t get up to save yourself quickly enough, not like this- your heart stops, knowing that this could be it. You squeeze your eyes shut and hide your face in your arms, ready to accept your fate…

…

…?

… You hesitantly lift your head, looking back towards the entrance to the tower.

Nothing’s there. The doors are shut firmly behind you. None of the things that pursued you down the tower followed you out. You take a deep, gasping breath- you hadn’t realized you’d been holding it, and collapse fully back into the grass again, just taking a moment to rest.

Dazed, your mind wanders to the exchange you’d had with Blue in the tower.

More than anything, what perplexes you is that other voice you’d heard, for only a brief moment…

“… you? Do the right thing, and get rid of the Eevee, boy. It’s…”

… You pray to the Gods that Blue will really be okay. Pure regret overwhelms you as you wish you would’ve grabbed him and ran together.

And yet… a part of you knows he wouldn’t have followed you.

Something soft and furry bumping against you takes you away from your thoughts. You shake it off, pushing yourself up to look down at Eevee.

At least it isn’t too hurt… Your fall must not have flung it too far, and you’re sure you took the brunt of the damage from your momentum, if the stinging of your scuffed arms, legs, and face was anything to go by.

You push yourself to your feet, looking down at yourself with a somber expression. Mud and grass color your pale jacket with green and brown, while streaks of red color your skinned knees and forearms. And all of your clothes- what’s left at this point, anyways- are damp from the dew you’d slid on. A feeling of bitterness strikes you at the loss of your beloved hat… But you wouldn’t dare step foot in that graveyard again. Not in a million years.

… You decide not to bother with your lost slipper, either. Walking with only one shoe on was getting uncomfortable, you try to justify to yourself.

At the very least, you’ve still got the clothes on your back, your jacket, and your bag… and Eevee, of course. You open the bag up, kneeling down to give it its little perch back. It jumps right over the bag and back onto your shoulder, though. After everything, you can’t really blame it for preferring the closer proximity.

Well! Nothing’s broken, at least. Always good to consider the bright side. As put-together as you possibly could be, you turn to look at the rest of your surroundings. It’s dim- seems like dawn, you figure, the dampness surrounding you most likely a product of a crisp morning signaling oncoming rain…

You’re somewhere familiar, though. That’s what strikes you most. You know where you are- from here, you could finally go home. You’re out of that death trap, and you know how to get back to Palette from here… it’s a long journey on foot, but maybe you could get help, or wait for Blue to emerge…

The thought of just waiting here doesn’t sit well with you, though. So, you elect to embark down one of the nearby routes.

…

You should know better by now to even think that this could be over.

You’ve tried every exit. Every facility where you could get help. The Pokemart? Locked. Pokemon Center? Locked. And all three of the exits…

Each and every one, closed off by those old white fences, and a line of ghosts- each spirit, seemingly a resident of this town, you recognize a few of them as well as the Nurse and Cashiers from the vacant facilities. They all stared down at you, sneering at your fruitless efforts to escape at every turn.

“You can’t hide from us.”

“You can’t escape from us.”

“Do you really think you have a chance?”

So, you’re stuck wandering the streets- still trying each home in the neighborhood here, knocking and begging for help, only to receive no answers. Why would you? Clearly, judging by the ghosts blocking off each road, nobody’s home… and nobody cares.

“Do you really think he cares about you?”

“Do you really think you can trust someone like him?”

The cynical voices seem to follow you from all sides as you try to find someone who’s still of flesh and blood around here. Each jab they make is trying to cut deeper than the last, and you find yourself trying to hurry up with each whisper. They’re getting harder and harder to ignore.

“Why even bother with a kid beyond reason…?”

“He’s not who you think he is.”

“He’s not your friend.”

You’re tired. You’re exhausted, in fact. You feel about ready to give up. You haven’t tried everything yet, though, so you can’t. It’s not like there’s any choice in the matter.

You approach one of the only homes you haven’t knocked on yet. You’re running out of options. What you need right now is a goddamn miracle.

Same as every other home, you reach out. Knock on the door. It’s silent.

You reach down. Try the doorknob.

And to your shock and relief… it opens.

You peer inside, feeling about ready to leap for joy. There’s a few people inside of the house, as well as some Pokemon- a younger girl, a Bug Catcher, and someone else sitting by the window. The Lass spots you, motioning for you to hurry in.

You gladly oblige, slumping back against the door. Just by being in here, as if smiled upon by some distant, divine protection, it seems like a huge weight has been lifted. Your injuries sting a bit less, your heartbeat steadies, and it’s like you can properly breathe again. You thank your lucky stars to have stumbled upon a place like this.

After a brief rest, you move forward to better take in your surroundings. It’s only now that something clicks- the layout, the Pokemon in here… This was Mr. Fuji’s house, wasn’t it? It certainly explains the more welcoming atmosphere- he was such a kind man and cared so deeply for any and all lonesome Pokemon. If this were a safe haven for those Pokemon, then it’d only make sense for the same to ring true for you and the other children in here.

The girl doesn’t directly acknowledge you, but you hear her sniffling, whispering to the Nidorino that had been a long-time resident. You faintly catch something about “wanting out of this nightmare,” and you can’t help but feel some relief in knowing that this isn’t all in your head.

The Bug Catcher is much quieter. You meet his striking green eyes for a moment- they almost seem to bore into you with a vaguely familiar look, and a faint amusement… he doesn’t say anything, though. Just turns his attention back to playing with the tiny Caterpie on the table- notably, the only Pokemon here that you don’t recognize as one of Mr. Fuji’s.

Whatever, you think. It’s not anyone you know. As far as you’re concerned, he’s unimportant- just another lucky kid who’d gotten away from the ghost, just like you, that lass, and the other person at the back…

When you look up at them fully, your thoughts screech to a halt.

The jacket- the hat-!

You could practically leap for joy. This isn’t just someone you know- this is someone you love, this is family, this is your brother-

“Red!!” you exclaim, hurrying over and nearly tackling him into a hug the second he turns to face you. You practically sob into his jacket, clinging onto him tight as if he’d fade away when you let go.

“Red- Red, oh my Gods,” you manage, “I’m so glad you’re here- I, I don’t know what happened-! I had this, this awful dream, I, I think- And now there’s ghosts, just- just everywhere, I– I woke up in Pokemon Tower, and- and Blue, he, he's…”

As you ramble, nearly manic as you confide in your brother about all the pain you’ve been through, your voice begins to grow weaker and weaker, until finally, you trail off completely. You’re almost too exhausted for words, but that’s not the only thing…

He’s barely even moved a muscle, no less actually reacted to your presence. It’s like you’re hugging a rock. And yes, Red’s always been on the more stoic side- but you pull back, and stare at his flat, borderline disinterested expression, the same as it’s literally always been, and you feel a pang of frustration.

Even once, could he be bothered to try to show that he cares? To even try to comfort you? You know he struggles with this emotional stuff, but… After everything you’ve been through, not even so much as a single word, not even one movement…

It’s like he’s staring right through you.

It’s like he doesn’t even care.

You try to swallow back your brewing frustration. Relax, Leaf. He’s… He’s usually like this. You just need to give him patience. Just a little grace, same as always. You just need to be patient.

You open your mouth, your next words tumbling out as barely a whisper.

BLUE GARY OAK

Height: 5'4
Pronouns: He/Him
Home Region: Kanto
Casual Team: Jolteon, Pidgeot (Otto), Exeggutor, Gyarados, Alakazam, Arcanine (Akira)
Blue has several other Pokemon kept in frequent rotation for more competitive battles: Machamp, Aerodactyl, Heracross, Rhypherior, and Tyranitar.

Once, Blue was a notorious local bully. But after the rude young boy lost his short-lived championship title to his neighbor and rival, Red, he seemed to recede into his own troubled mind, turning his back on the world. Dark periods never last forever, though- soon enough he began to straighten his life out, taking on the responsibility of becoming the Leader of Viridian Gym, and later, taking years away from home to see the world and find himself.

Nowadays, he’s become widely respected and considered on equal footing with his childhood rival once again. A budding Pokemon Researcher, dedicated Gym Leader, and passionate trainer- though he still hasn’t lost the cocky attitude, Blue’s grown up into a new man. Still, he never quite forgets about the past, and sometimes it still drags him back down.

[Transcription of design notes and color hex values under the cut.]

Hair: #b78443 (main) + #8c5e32, #dd9c50

Hair is multicolored. These aren’t highlights, but streaks.

Skin: #faded0 (main) + #f9efe9 (old scars) + #daa489 (freckles - multiply, airbrush) + #e59e99, #d4837d (deep/new scars)

Fresh cuts vary- most on torso/thighs, and left arm.

Eyes: #ffffff, #d6e5f1 (sclera, shaded) + #7a5723, #976f3f (iris, brown) + #008eff (iris, blue - color dodge over the brown.)

Sectoral heterochromia.

Inside of mouth has cooler colors. (#9e556c, #bd82a6)

Necklace + Earrings: #9398b0, #c9cbd7

Always wearing necklace + small hoop earrings.

Note for outfits:

If details like the back of a shirt or underside of shoes aren’t specified, they’re plain and colored like the front/top.

Pants/choker/bracelet: #171318, #231e24

Shirt: #284fb8, #587be1

Boots: #414046 + #57565c, #323137 + #76757b, #221d22

Bandages: #eff0f5

Keystone: #caccd8, #9398b0 + #c071ff, #7199ff, #71fff2, #8cff71, #fffea3 + #0f0370 (multiply)

White overlay for shine.

Pants + Belt: #bb9765, #171318, #caccd8

Shirt + Jacket: #414046 + #57565c, #323137 + #76757b, #221d22 (greys) + #e4c49b, (tan) + #fbf8f3 (white)

White tanktop under jacket.

General Note:

Details of these forms can vary based on circumstance. This is more like examples and a style guides than a concrete reference- I’ve tried to note every key part for each.

SORRY!

YOU HAVE NOT YET UNLOCKED THIS INFORMATION.

THIS IMAGE WILL BE FULLY REVEALED WHEN YOU ENCOUNTER:

“N A M I D A”

HOW IT FEELS TO DISAPPEAR: DESCENT

Note: while id usually coin toss on a 50/50 poll, this one feels fair to utilize both.
WARNINGS: Disturbing Imagery, Self Harm

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[Truth] / [Ask your own question]

You watch the ghost uneasily, pulling Eevee closer to you. Her question doesn’t make sense, but…

Your mind wanders back to that young voice. The one calling out to you on the wind, whispers that sounded like a child’s… Is that what she means…?

… You nod slowly.

“… Good. This must be why your Pokemon loves you….” she breathes. You watch as she turns to walk away.

An impulse flares up inside of you. You can’t stand to let another ghost leave you confused.

“Wait,” you call to her, voice raising as she initially seems to ignore you. “DAISY!”

She stops just short of fading into the black.

You tense, dread welling up in your chest. Still, though, you force your words out as a wavering yell.

“Why- Why is this happening?!”

Your single plea hangs heavy in the air. The void feels all the more suffocating for it, and you swear you can feel the weight of it all bearing down on you, threatening to crush and swallow you whole.

The ghost turns to face you, an almost taunting smile tearing open and spreading across her face.

“… Why don’t you go and see for yourself?”

A wave of fatigue suddenly washes over you.

Before you even get the chance to think, your knees buckle, and you collapse to the floor.

…

…

Your head is throbbing. That’s the first thing you’re able to notice.

The second is the feeling of cold, tile floor underneath you.

The third is something small and furry batting at your nose.

Your eyes flutter open. Even with the dim lights of the environment, it takes a moment for your vision to adjust enough to make out your surroundings. As you focus in, the hardest thing to miss is what you register first- Eevee, sitting in front of you with its ears pressed flat against its head. It paws at your nose, seemingly attempting to wake you. Fortunately, once it notices you opening your eyes, it relaxes a bit, stepping aside and shimmying under one of your limp arms.

As you fully wake, you prop yourself up on one elbow and lift your head to look around. You know for certain you aren’t where you blacked out at, but it takes a moment for it to sink in that you’re…

Oh.

Tiled floors. Dim lights. Headstones surround you from every side. A gentle purple coloring to every piece of your surroundings.

It’s all the familiar sights of the Pokemon Tower.

You hold on to Eevee, shakily pushing yourself to a sitting position. A part of you dully hopes that maybe… Maybe, this has all been a bad dream. Maybe you just passed out after finding the Eevee. You try desperately to rationalize it all in your mind, how and why you could have ended up in this place that you never liked nor wanted to visit. This place that you only ever bothered with for the sake of your friend, and to play the hero.

But you already know in your rational mind that your desperate attempts to explain this to yourself are pointless.

After all, you’re still wearing the jacket.

You clutch Eevee closer to your chest as you struggle to your feet. You reach up, re-adjusting and securing your beloved hat. Eevee clings onto you as you try to straighten yourself out, smoothing your dress and new jacket out.

You know very well you’re only doing this to avoid facing the place you’ve wound up in, ‘cause in the back of your mind, you keep noticing more and more details that give away how much worse the part of the tower you’ve awoken in is than you first realized.

You’ve only stepped foot in this area once, and that was only because you had to. Even the idea of it made you uneasy- you know that it’s only gossip and rumors, but… It always seemed just plausible enough to make you want to steer completely clear of the entire graveyard.

You couldn’t help it- death always unsettled you. That one day, any living thing could stop breathing, stop thinking, stop existing, and you’d never really know what happened after- other than them being buried, decaying, and eventually forgotten.

… Children all through Kanto loved to echo the ghost stories surrounding this place, and yeah, maybe they had gotten to you. Malicious and mischievous spirits were one thing- you’d seen those, fought them even. Ghost-types were rare, but not unheard of. Not the sort of thing that kids would tell around campfires in an attempt to scare you, not in this day and age, where any trainer worth their salt could easily catch a Pokemon like a Ghastly, Haunter, Gengar…

No, it was the real rumors that scared you. Horror stories.

A song with tones that drove kids your age to illness, madness, suicide. Grotesque white hands that changed shape into that of your Pokemon and loved ones, just to torment you. A black ghost unlike any Pokemon whose curse could end your life faster than you could even draw a final breath. Whispers of a massive Haunter revered once as a God.

But through all of the wild and chilling tales about Lavender Town that echoed through Kanto, it was the simplest one that had always made your skin crawl most.

They say that once, they buried a human on the top floor of the Tower.

The floor you’re standing on right now.

You feel nauseous at the thought that somehow, someway, after encountering honest-to-the-Gods ghosts, you’d suddenly been dropped here of all places.

You don’t want to play these games anymore. You’ve gone along with it for long enough. Though you see the path through the graves laid out before you, lit dimly by candles and the white glow you’ve come to associate with those damn ghosts, you refuse to keep carrying on. You don’t want to. You need to go home.

You turn around, clinging to Eevee with a bitter determination to go down the stairs and out of this damn graveyard.

… But there’s no staircase. No opening. No way out. Not even a trace.

You run up to the stone wall where it should’ve been, nearly slamming your body against it. Eevee crawls onto your shoulders as you desperately pound your fists against the hard stone, moving back and forth- as if some illusion should drop, as if some barrier will break, as if something would happen. Your eyes are starting to water, the thought emerging in the back of your mind that you’re trapped here.

You can’t be- you can’t be, you can’t be, you can’t be you can’t be you can’t be you can’t. Your Pokemon are powerful- they could break through by force! You reach into your bag by instinct, hoping to get one of your most powerful partners’ Pokeballs- Dragonite, Venusaur, maybe Clefable- anything, anything.

All your hand hits is Eevee’s blanket. Your bag is empty. You left your Pokeballs- your team, at home.

Your eyes and throat start to sting as angry, frustrated tears well up and burn. How could you be so stupid- taking Eevee with, but none of your most loyal companions?!

You slam your hands against the stone wall one more time, unthinking, hard enough to make it fucking hurt. A frustrated, sobbing scream rips through your throat. The hot tears run down your face, and you let your head thud against the wall as you go limp, searing pain shooting from your hands down your arms. The feeling of Eevee nuzzling your cheek no longer does anything to soothe you through your self-directed anger.

You heave a few deep breaths, before whirling around, clenching your now-bruising fists and yelling out into the sea of headstones.

“WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?!”

Squeezing your eyes shut, you feel the gazes and quiet laughter of ghosts surround and burn into you. You pull on your hair hard enough to make your scalp hurt, before charging forward into the open pathway of graves.

“FINE. FINE! Whatever gets this OVER with,” you growl, storming past the distant forms of spirits that you can’t be bothered to look at any more than from the corners of your eyes. The robes make them resemble the tower’s Channelers, but hell if you care anymore.

Eevee trembles from its perch on your shoulder, and you look down, staring at the blooming purple on the sides of your hands. You gingerly rub them, trying to soothe the pain. Some of the ire inside you dissipates as you move, and you dully start to regret hurting yourself like that…

Another reason to the list of why you should keep your temper in check, is your only bitter thought.

When you lift your head to pay attention to the path of tombstones laid out for you, though, every thought screeches to a halt.

There, at the end, like a light in the darkness that you’ve been needing.

It’s Blue.

Oh my Gods, you think, you could sob in relief at just the sight of your friend. It’s Blue, it’s Blue- really, genuinely Blue, in full color, flesh and blood, tangible and visible and audible and breathing and alive and real. You nearly break into a sprint towards him, relief washing over you and sending all that dread knotted up in your stomach far, far away.

“Blue- Blue!” you choke out, skidding to a stop right behind him. You open your mouth, about to let every word and cry and every ounce of joy you feel seeing someone you truly know here, living and intact and not white, not pale, he’s colorful, it’s him, it’s him, it’s…

Your words die in your mouth when you realize the state he’s in.

Your tunnel vision rapidly fades away. He’s… not okay. No, something’s wrong. Not with him, you hope- he looks fine, but…

He’s crying. You hear the quiet, gasping sobs. His shoulders are shaking. He’s practically curled into a ball, his hands over his ears and gripping his hair, his knees to his chest, his head lowered and staring straight at the floor.

“Please,” you hear him whimper, “stop- please, make it stop- please, please, just leave me alone…”

… It’s not the floor he’s staring at. You manage to pull your gaze away from him to realize what he’s knelt in front of.

It’s a grave- one far bigger than the rest. The headstone is unmarked, but shouldered on both sides by statues of Pokemon. A rectangular slab juts out of the ground, too… You recognize it from the only time you’d come up here. You’d battled Team Rocket, you remember… Then you’d found Mr. Fuji over this grave, hoping to soothe the angry Marowak’s spirit…

You’d always assumed this grave was hers. It hadn’t made sense to you that you’d found her on the floor below, but you’d rationalized that by assuming the ghosts here just wandered. But thinking of it, if she’d died recently, then a grave like that couldn’t have been made so quickly- certainly not with Team Rocket around. And it had been far too big for just a Marowak…

You put a hand over your mouth, swallowing down the taste of bile at the implications.

Whose grave was this? Why was Blue here…?

Your mind is starting to wander, you realize. You force yourself to reel those thoughts in. You can swallow your own horror, your anger, your confusion for a moment- even now, you can’t let your own emotions make your friend’s problems worse. You’d already hurt him enough before.

“I don’t want this. I didn’t want this.”

His hushed, broken voice breaks your heart. You need to do something, you tell yourself. He needs help. You’re not even sure he’s noticed that you’re here, but you can’t just stand here.

HOW IT FEELS TO DISAPPEAR: DESCENT

WARNINGS: Scopophobia, Disturbing Imagery, Blood.

FIRST || PREV | NEXT

[Take it with you.]

A strange feeling washes over you as you stare down at the Eevee. Those whispers in the back of your mind, demanding that you leave it behind. But looking into those wide, scared eyes… You swear, you can see them welling up with tears.

You don’t have it in you to go without it.

You walk back across your room, grabbing your bag lazily hanging off your desk chair. Eevee eagerly follows after you, still trembling but starting to wag its tail- you figure it knows what you’re doing. As soon as you open the bag up and kneel down, it jumps inside, quickly nestling up in the pillow and fuzzy blanket you’ve lined the bottom with- this had quickly become its favorite way to stay at your side, so you’d at least had enough sense to make it a bit more comfortable… It makes it impossible to close it in, but you haven’t needed to hide it, and you figure that won’t change- there’s only one person you’re deliberately hiding it from, anyways…

You sling the bag over your shoulder, ruffling a hand through the fur on Eevee’s head. It purrs, rubbing against you.

With that, you’re pretty sure you’ve got everything you need… You walk downstairs tiredly, only dully noticing how Miss Hazel isn’t in the kitchen or living room like she’d usually be right now… Probably out on some errand, you think, as you continue on towards the front door and swing it open.

You’re met face to face with a certain young man, his hand raised awkwardly, apparently going to knock just as you’d opened the door.

Blue Oak stares at you, almost dumbfounded at your impeccable timing.

“… Uh… Hey, Leaf- I’m, uh. I’m sorry to bother you,” he starts, bringing his hand down to rub over his arms. “I was starting to… Worry, I- I hadn’t- I haven’t seen you since… And I was thinking, like, that’s not like her, but I didn’t want to…..”

He trails off. Looks away. Blue was never the most open of books, and you watch with tired eyes as he searches for his words. He opens his mouth, shuts it- he looks you up and down, expression seeming to toe the line between confusion and concern as he processes the state you’re in.

Discomfort, anxiety, awkwardness- you watch the tension shatter into a frozen, mortified horror as his gaze locks onto your bag.

Confusion briefly crosses your mind as to what could possibly illicit that reaction from him, but as Blue steps backwards, it hits you all at once:

Your bag is wide open. Eevee stares up at him, bristling and snarling at the boy.

You suck in a breath through your teeth, hurrying to try and explain yourself and that it really isn’t aggressive, it’s just scared, but Blue speaks before you can get a single word out:

“You need to get rid of that thing.”

What?

“What?!” you exclaim, instantly echoing the whirl of confusion in your mind. “You can’t- Blue, you’re joking, right?”

You can already tell he’s not joking. That’s what confuses you the most. He’s trembling as if he saw a ghost, all the color drained from his face and his fingernails practically tearing into the armbands he always wore.

A voice in the back of your mind chides; he’s right, you know. You ignore it.

“Leaf- Leaf, please, you have to listen to me-” he stammers out, his unsteady voice dropping to a near whisper as he backs further away. “Please- that Eevee, it’s- it’s a-”

You move forward, wanting to soothe and listen to him in spite of your confusion.

When you step out of your front door, you are not in Palette Town.

Blue is gone. The afternoon sunshine is gone. The buildings outside your home are gone. The green grass and dirt pathways are gone.

You look behind you. Even your home is suddenly dark, and completely empty. As if it’s been abandoned for years.

You look back to your surroundings, fear rising in your chest and stinging like bile.

A dense fog shrouds the area, blinding and suffocating. You can barely see your own two feet. You squint, trying to forcibly steady your breathing as you take a hesitant step forward.

… You nearly run face-first into a fence. You hold onto the wooden posts, trying to gather your wits and see what’s going on. It’s a tall fence, painted white… It’s too tall to reasonably climb over- certainly not with the dew from the fog slicking it up, and while it has gaps big enough to see through, they’re more than narrow enough to keep you or even Eevee from squeezing through.

Dully, you imagine the bars of a jail cell. You shiver.

Looking a bit closer, you can faintly make out trees on the outside. It seems like… The autumn leaves have come in. You watch the fuzzy shapes of leaves dancing through the air and onto the ground, one landing close enough for you to make out the dazzling red. It compliments the wilted, brown grass well, you think bitterly.

… That’s all you’re able to gather, though. You turn to your right, seeing that the fence seems to connect to the house that way…

It’s the opposite direction that seems to open up, making a narrow dirt path, fully enclosed by white wood.

A part of you wants to optimistically think that at least you’re not trapped, but you… You don’t know how much you really believe that. But no matter what you want to think, one thing is clear:

There’s only one way to go.

You start walking.

… The path seems to stretch on, but you find yourself grateful that it’s straightforward. With this awful fog, you’d only feel queasier about any unpredictability… And there’s the little things- lazily running one hand along the wood keeps you on a straightforward path and the cool dew on your skin helps to keep you alert.

You think it’s been more than a few minutes of walking, though. Maybe this strange place can read you, somehow, because just as you’re starting to space out, you spot something in the distance-

A person…! You instantly perk up, recognizing some kind of human silhouette through the fog ahead. They seem to be sitting cross-legged on the ground, slumped back against the fence behind them, but you’re sure of it- you’re sure of it. Someone else is here!

You pick up the pace a bit, eager to have company, or answers, or anything. You ignore Eevee’s whimpering as your approach the stranger.

… As you get closer, though, you start to understand its worry.

You begin to make out details on them as you close the gap between you and the stranger.

Or… Lack thereof.

This is not a human.

You slow to a stop in front of them. You can feel your legs shaking, that primal part of your mind screaming to run.

Its body seems to be that of an older man’s- you think vaguely of those gamblers you fought outside of Vermilion City… That’s where the traces of humanity seem to end, though. The ghastly man is vaguely see-through, he seems to have no mouth, and he’s completely void of color, every last feature a stark and unnatural white.

He’s like a ghost, you think to yourself. But you don’t think he’s noticed you… You start to back away to continue down the path, hoping to avoid whatever danger this thing might pose.

Too late, though. He suddenly opens his eyes.

Seems like you were wrong about one thing, you think as you feel your mouth run dry.

A crimson gaze bores into you, and you watch in horror as the place where his mouth should have been rips open- all so he can flash you an awful, bright red smile. Blood trickles from his lips and bulging eyes, as if it weren’t truly parts of his face, but open wounds.

Your paralyzing terror only increases as he sneers at you, motioning to the trembling Eevee in your bag.

“HAH… REALLY? ALL IN FOR THAT LOST CAUSE… CAN’T YOU DO BETTER, GIRL?”

HOW IT FEELS TO DISAPPEAR: DESCENT

Note: well, it’s all downhill from here. also FUCK its 2am again.
WARNINGS: Scopophobia, Disturbing Imagery, Blood.

FIRST || PREV | NEXT

[“I was just wondering if you were ready to go!”]

Thinking quickly, you decide to just play innocent. If you can’t lie, why not just… Avoid the truth?

“I was just wondering if you were ready to go!” you exclaim, folding your hands behind your back and smiling down at him. He looks up at you, quirking an eyebrow. He looks like he wants to question you further, but… He sighs, and just shakes his head.

“Not yet bud. Sorry,” he replies simply. “You can go on ahead, though. I’ll be fine. ‘sides, I didn’t exactly ask you to come in the first place, did I?”

You feel your cheeks heat up a bit. He’s got you there- you had really insisted on tagging along, and here you are, wandering off and trying to drag him away before he wants to leave… How rude!

He must notice how you’re quietly kicking yourself, because his expression softens into a warm smile.

“Hey- don’t sweat it. Remember, we’re neighbors, Leaf. You can come and bug me any time you want. Promise.”

That gets you to calm down a little. Sometimes you forget, you’ll admit… You’re lucky that Blue turned out to be so patient with you, despite everything.

You’re grateful to have him by your side.

“You got it!” you finally chime in reply. “Well… I guess in that case- I’ll see you soon, okay? I’ll make sure to come over!”

He nods, standing up before you get on your way. You can see him mulling something over in his mind, judging by the look on his face…

Before you can question, he leans in, squeezing you tight in a hug.

The worry of oh Gods what if he feels the bag flashes across your mind, but…

You can tell that’s not what he’s doing. You relax into your friends arms, returning the gesture with all the warmth you can muster.

After a long moment, Blue pulls away, averting his gaze and rubbing a hand over his eyes.

“Alllllright, get outta here,” he insists, “And don’t tell anyone I’m going soft, you got that?!”

You beam and nod quickly. “Course! Big Bad Blue Oak being a hugger… Your secret’s safe with me!” you chime, before turning to jog off towards the exit.

“I’ll come visit soon!!!” you call over your shoulder, waving goodbye. You see him wave back at you, before you lose sight of him as you hop down the stairs.

Once you’re outside of the tower, you call out your Dragonite, and fly home. You hope to visit Blue tomorrow… But for now, you’ve got an Eevee to take care of.

…

Two weeks pass.

Trying to nurse the Eevee back to health has been more difficult than you anticipated. You’ve tried everything. You’ve fed and watered it well, played with it, slept with it, tried a whole variety of medicines and home remedies.

No matter what you tried, its condition just won’t improve, and it looks just like how you found it, if not worse. Worried about deeper ailments, you even managed to drag it into a Pokemon center last week, in spite of its screams and protests. The nurses did a checkup and everything- nothing abnormal came up, other than the stuff you already knew, that it was scrawny and runty and whatever. The only remarkable things you took away from the visit was the surprising strength of the claws on the little bugger, and that weirdo Nurse Joy who told you to “be careful with a Pokemon like that.”

It’s like they assumed you just waltzed in with an untrained wild Eevee!

It frustrated you so much that you just went back to trying to treat it yourself. Of course, Eevee calmed down as soon as you got home, and you’ve barely left the house since then- you can’t bear to leave it alone for how bad its separation anxiety is.

At least it doesn’t act up at home like it did in the Center… Other than that one day, it’s been nothing but a little angel for you.

… You’re regretting not getting out more, and you wish so badly you could just take it with- especially to visit your friend, like you keep meaning to… But you’ve noticed, every time you mentioned visiting your neighbor, Eevee freaks out and hides. You figure it’s one of those abused Pokemon that’s afraid of men, honestly. The thought makes you chuckle- a cruel means of gender affirmation for the boy, if you could tell him. But… You’ve decided to continue keeping its care a secret from him for now.

Still, not leaving the house as much as you do usually is taking a toll. You feel like you’re coming down with some kind of awful cabin fever- For one, you’ve started losing your appetite… Add on general weakness, sleeping in later and going to bed earlier, and increasingly frequent headaches, and you’d have already been worried.

But these past few days have gotten… Severe.

You think you’re starting to hallucinate.

White figures peering through your windows. Whispers in the back of your mind. Bloodstains throughout your house.

You’ve decided this has gotten bad enough. You’re going to the hospital.

You roll out of bed. Trudge over to your closet- throw on the simplest clothes you can find- a comfortable black dress with pockets, black slippers, and your trusty old bucket hat. You just grab your wallet and turn to leave, half-dazed as you start towards downstairs before something grabs at your legs.

Don’t leave me.

You look down at the Eevee, as it chirps, cries, and paws at you fearfully. In the exhausted state you’re in, you’d almost forgotten about your little buddy.

Despite how much it hates leaving the house…

HOW IT FEELS TO DISAPPEAR: DESCENT

FIRST/PREV | NEXT

[Tell Blue you saw something.]

“Hey, uh… I’m- I’m so sorry, but I think I saw something weird…”

“… You tend to get that in a haunted graveyard,” he replies flatly, turning to look back at you with a raised eyebrow.

“I- I KNOW,” you scoff, “I caught plenty of Ghost Pokemon around here! I just… Don’t think this was one of those…? I’m worried- what if it’s a stray Pokemon? It looked tiny…”

He frowns, scratching his chin.

“You don’t have to stay stuck to me at the hip, man,” he replies. “You wanna look around? Look around. Just… Try to be careful, would you? Don’t go too far, don’t head up any other floors… Gods know what kind of curses or bad omens are lying around here.”

You spring to your feet, nodding quickly.

“Of course-! Trust me, I wouldn’t dream of doing anything reckless,” you assure him. He laughs a bit, nodding in return.

“Good. Cause I swear, if I have to bury you, I’m gonna ACTUALLY go crazy.”

You giggle with him, giving a big salute- although a part of you can tell he’s not entirely joking. You brush the thought aside, though. You’re a capable trainer- probably the most capable trainer in all of Kanto! You know you don’t have anything to worry about.

“Well, you can tuck that shovel away, Mr. Gravedigger- I’ll be fine! Cross my heart, hope to not-die.” you tell him lightheartedly. “I’ll just be right back, okay?”

He nods. “Okay.”

With that, you step back, walking farther into this floor of the graveyard. You carefully maneuver around the various headstones- what kind of bad karma would it be to knock a grave out of place, you think with a shudder. But you’re careful as always. Being cautious was never a problem for you, after all!

… You end up searching between the cracks and crevices of tombs and graves for a while, though. You feel about ready to call it quits, doing one last walk around the outer walls of this floor, when you finally spot the culprit of that brown little blur that had scared you so badly, hiding in a far corner behind a grave:

An Eevee.

The poor thing looks terrible… Thin, sickly, and trembling. Your heart sinks for it- Eevees aren’t from this part of Kanto, and especially with the state it’s in, someone must have dumped the Pokemon in the tower and called it a day. It’s starving so bad, you can see its ribs, and you wonder; how long has it been here…?

You try to approach quietly, as to avoid startling it- but when it sees you, it still tenses, its hackles raising and its ears flattening against its head. You can’t blame it- being abandoned by some cruel trainer must’ve done awful things for its trust of humans.

Still, you aren’t going to get anywhere if its scared of you.

HOW IT FEELS TO DISAPPEAR. (Part 1: DESCENT)

FLASHBACK: ABANDON LONLINESS.

A retelling of Abandon Lonliness in how it unfurled in Missing Numbers.
This story will contain: Psychological Horror. Implied Animal Neglect. Animal Death. Implied Child Death. Unreality.

You never belonged here.

EXPLANATION | FIRST | NEXT

………………………………………………………………

YOU ARE A 12 YEAR OLD GIRL WITH LONG BROWN HAIR, AND HAZEL EYES THAT SEEM TO TOE THE LINE BETWEEN BROWN AND GREEN. AND YOU’VE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER, PROUDLY HOLDING THE TITLE OF THE CHAMPION OF KANTO AS OF ONE WEEK AGO.

TODAY, YOU ARE WITH YOUR FRIEND, BLUE. A BOY WHO STARTED AS YOUR ENEMY, BUT BECAME YOUR FRIEND THROUGHOUT YOUR JOURNEY. YOU ARE GLAD YOU UNDERSTAND HIM. YOU ARE GLAD HE TRUSTS YOU.

YOU ARE KEEPING HIM COMPANY AS HE GRIEVES A LOST POKEMON.

…

Your mind keeps wandering to the Championship fight. You’ve been trying not to feel too guilty- you won fair and square, after all. Neither of you held back. And even though you could see the hurt in his eyes when you did, he only forced a smile and congratulated you, leaving before Professor Oak arrived. You’ve talked about it several times since then, but he always repeated that you deserved it more than him. 

It didn’t sit right with you, but you’ve been determined to ensure that this didn’t cause a rift between you two. You care so much about him, especially after he opened up… Even proving to you how he seemed to know just what to expect every step of the way- everything except for you.

Either way- you made a point to be a better friend to him than ever before. And if that means coming with him to this creepy, haunted graveyard, then… So be it! You’re not scared! No sir!

Being there for him matters more, anyways. 

Though it’s been pretty quiet… A part of you must have expected for such a loud boy to grieve more openly, but you suppose he’s always been more… Restrained in this place. More respectful. As for you, though, you’ve never lost a Pokemon… Not yet, anyways. So, maybe you just don’t understand. 

Still, you can’t help but feel a bit bored. You wouldn’t dream of doing anything disrespectful here, but your gaze does start to wander. You skim over the names on each headstone- loving nicknames of Pokemon since passed, usually settled over sentimental messages and last goodbyes, forever etched into stone.

But as you look around, you nearly jump out of your skin when you spot the movement of something small scampering away through the gaps of nearby graves. It takes a moment to soothe yourself enough to realize that it couldn’t have been a ghost… They don’t dwell on this floor of the Pokemon Tower, and this wasn’t the angry purples of a restless spirit, or a mischievous Ghastly or Haunter… You’re pretty sure that was… Brown?

Blue seems to have missed it, caught up in his own silent mourning.

themissingnumbers:

themissingnumbers:

what fire and blue got up to in alola - 1/5

most people consider alola their honeymoon and as much as i enjoy that, in mn its their get-along vacation - 2/5

i dont care!!! i dont caree i dont care about him i hope he DIES i hope he dies i fucking hate him (blue, lying) - 3/5

themissingnumbers:

what fire and blue got up to in alola - 1/5

most people consider alola their honeymoon and as much as i enjoy that, in mn its their get-along vacation - 2/5

what fire and blue got up to in alola - 1/5

creatively-cosmic:

chilling in alola 💖💖💖

creatively-cosmic:

yet through everything, you’ll never accept it

possiblyfunny:

Oh look, another art piece-

He a little confused, but he got the spirit

WOO! After getting confirmation on details about the character, I finally allowed myself to draw this! It was originally going to be a mini comic, but I just decided to draw the last panel with a lot more detail.

Blue belongs to @creatively-cosmic. They have an Ask Blog by the name of @themissingnumbers, so go check them out! Their content is great!

Aster belongs to me.

[Extras and whatnot below the cut!]

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